Let’s start by making some crystal clear right here and right now; moms are awesome (unless they are abusive and awful, and then they are not awesome). Moms do something no one else in this world can do (aside from everything). We carry babies in our bodies, give birth to them, and still somehow manage to do everything for everyone all the time. I have the world’s most helpful and supportive husband, but as an amazing father as he is, I’m still the go-to, the number one, the only one who can tie shoes the right way, put a band aid on just right or find things that are missing in our house. I’m the one who knows which episode of Bubble Guppies is “that one with that thing,” out of the 58 episodes we have on our DVR; I’m a mom. And that makes me awesome. Moms are beautiful in all shapes and sizes, in all personalities and in all manners possible. We do something so amazing everyday that we have no time to be anything less than amazing.
But…moms worry. We worry about everything, especially our own flaws. I’m the first to admit I get up earlier than necessary because I want to not only be a good mom, but look good at the same time. I’m just vain enough to know I’m off-kilter if I don’t feel good about myself, and I’m not ashamed of that. As a mom, I worry about my beauty flaws. My husband tells me I have none (as I’m sure yours does as well), and I’d like to believe him, but I’m a mom; I’m emotions and probably a bit crazy. It’s cool. As a mom, there are things I worry about in terms of my own beauty; and I’m here to share those worries with you so that you know you are not the only mom in the world worried about these self-perceived beauty flaws.
If you have a baby in your body, you will gain weight. I’m here to tell you that we all worry about this. We all worry about getting back in shape after every baby is born. I’ll be honest and admit I’m the mom whose weight drops off in the first week, but I’ll also tell you that hearing people tell me that makes them sick is a little annoying because it’s months and MONTHS of hard work to make sure that skin tightens back up and feels good again. Don’t hate on the moms who bounce right back, and don’t hate on the moms that don’t. We are all built differently and we all have our own worries without adding the hatred of others to get to us. Just eat well, exercise when your doctor tells you that it’s okay and take care of yourself.
Even if your babies sleep through the night, you will still have puffy eyes. You will have puffy eyes because you work your behind off harder every single day now than you ever did in your entire life. And you don’t really get to sleep in often anymore. Even if your husband lets you sleep in on the weekends while he does baby duty, we all know you’re still going to be up by 7:30. Get some good concealer.
Post-Partum Hair Loss
This is the worst. Your hair is beautiful and luscious and thick and perfect for nine months and all of a sudden it’s falling out in chunks that make you feel like a patient undergoing chemotherapy (that’s not a bad joke, that’s just how much hair it looks like a times). It happens, but it will stop. I promise. Give it a few months, invest in some cute hats, and it will stop.
Post-Partum Hair Growth
Almost worse than the hair loss is the excessive hair growth on your head after your baby is born. All of a sudden you realize you have a full set of “kindergartener who got a hold of the scissors” bangs across your forehead and tiny little hairs growing in and sticking up all over the place. Sorry; it’s going to take about a year for this hair to become long enough to blend in. And while you are all hating on yours, imagine me who just had twins and now has twice the excessive hair growing in. I look – regularly – like I’ve been sticking my finger in a light socket.
Enough said, right? It happens with parenting. Some get it. Some don’t get it. Some cover it up, some embrace it. Just do yourself a favor and get used to it and taking care of it, because it only gets worse from this point forward.
Your kids will chew on your fingers, your fingers will spend more time cleaning things you’d rather never have to touch and you will never paint them again. Well, you will, but they will chip in record time because you now wash your hands 9821851658 times a day, and that’s where it shows most.
Excessive Hair Growth
We already talked about this, right? We talked about it on your head. We didn’t talk about it everywhere else. For me, this happens on my legs. I can shave in the morning and look like it’s been 24 hours by the time I pick my kids up from school. For others, it happens in other places that you might not want to talk about. Handle it.
Some women get acne after baby is born. It might just be a bit excessive when you’re PMSing or it might be all the time. Even if you’ve never had it before, you can get it. And your previous face cleanser might not be effective enough to handle it after a while, so you might need to change your beauty routine to work better with your new skin.
Oh, the dryness of my skin. Before my twins were born almost 10 months ago, I always had happy skin. It wasn’t oily or dry, it was nice. I had two girls at that point. My girlfriend with two boys used to tell me all the time I was having a boy before we found out at 18 weeks we were actually having twins (one of which is a boy) because my skin was drier and drier every single day. She told me boys suck the moisture right out of your body, and she was not lying. I’m still dry. I’m a lotion-aholic, and my skin is so dry. It’s not just you. It’s a lot of us. Just keep moisturizing.
Hormonal changes in a woman’s pregnancy can actually cause her to begin showing age spots or sun spots. She can get freckles while pregnant, or after. She can get sun spots or age spots. Hormones are a funny thing (just ask your husband) and they do things to us we hate. Just talk to your doctor about these to ensure that they’re nothing more than just this and take his or her advice on how to minimize the appearance.
Photo by Jennifer Polixenni Brankin/Getty Images