
Passive-aggressive phrases might seem harmless, but they can hurt trust and make things tense in relationships. In this article, we are going to talk about 15 passive-aggressive phrases you might be using without even realizing how hurtful and resentful they can sound to others.
“Fine, whatever.”

You often use this phrase as a way to end a conversation abruptly when you are feeling upset or frustrated. All it does is show a lack of interest in resolving the issue and can leave the other person feeling dismissed. Instead, try to be clear about your feelings, and speak more openly by saying something like, “I’m feeling a little overwhelmed right now, can we discuss this later?”
“I’m not mad.”

If you are saying this, you are probably feeling some anger in you. And that is completely alright. But it is always better to address anything that is bothering you directly rather than pretending everything is okay. Accept your feelings and communicate them clearly. Trust us, it will make things easier for everyone.
“No offense, but…”

This phrase generally precedes something very offensive or insensitive even. You could call it a way to soften the blow, but it mostly has just the opposite effect. So, be straightforward and also show consideration in your words. If you need to give feedback, always do so respectfully and constructively.
“Just saying.”

We often use this one to downplay a critical comment. But think about it, it can come across as dismissive and disrespectful towards the other person. If you have a point to make, stand by it without this qualifier. If you just own your opinions, it shows that you are confident about what you are saying and also encourages open dialogue.
“I was only joking.”

We all hate this frankly. If you said something and someone did not find your joke funny, saying this phrase will only invalidate their feelings. And you absolutely do not want to do that to your friends or family. Or anyone. Be mindful of your humor and apologize if it is hurtful. Humor should bring people together, not create distance or discomfort.
“If you really cared, you would…”

Once again, a passive aggressive phrase. This one kind of manipulates the other person by questioning their feelings. Instead, you can talk about your needs clearly, say what you need without questioning their intentions. Focus on expressing what you need in a positive and direct manner instead of a backhand approach.
“It’s fine.”

When do people say this? When things are clearly not fine, and you just want a way to avoid confrontation. But, in reality, this kind of a response will only lead to more unresolved issues and resentment in relationships. It is better to be honest about your feelings and work towards a solution.
“I don’t want to argue.”

While it is important to avoid unnecessary arguments, using this phrase could even shut down valid conversations. It is important that you differentiate between unproductive arguing and healthy debate. Always approach conversations with an open mind and a willingness to listen. Be open to discussing issues respectfully.
“You always…” or “You never…”

We call these absolute sentences. And by absolute sentences we mean they shut down all conversation. These absolutes are often exaggerations, and you can even make the other person feel defensive. So instead, you can focus on specific behaviors instead of generalizing everything. If anything is disturbing you, speak up. It will definitely lead to a more productive conversation.
“I guess I’ll just do it myself.”

This one is filled with so much anger and resentment towards the other person. You really do not want to do that to your close ones. Using this phrase means that you do not trust others to help or that you are the only one capable. Ask for help directly and appreciate the efforts that others put in for you.
“Whatever you want.”

If you use this phrase when you are actually unhappy with the decision, are you being fair to yourself or the other person? No, you are not. Think about it. Be open about your preferences and there is nothing wrong in voicing it. Your opinions are valuable and should be considered.
“I’m not trying to be rude, but…”

What does this mean? That you know that your comment may be offensive or rude. But you are still choosing to say it anyway. It shows sheer inconsideration for the feelings of those around you. So, consider the impact of your words and be kind and empathetic when you communicate.
“That’s not what I meant.”

If someone misunderstands you, it is very important to clarify what and where the problem lies. So, if you are using this phrase too often, it might mean you need to communicate more clearly. Take the time to clarify your intentions and make sure your message is being received as intended.
“I’m fine.”

When you say this, most often your body language says otherwise. All you are doing here is sending mixed signals. It can prevent others from understanding your needs and be helpful even if they want. It is okay to be vulnerable and share when you are not okay. Trust us, it will lead to deeper connections.
“You’re overreacting.”

Never ever say this. This phrase can be completely dismissive and invalidate how the other person is feeling. Instead of judging their reaction, try to understand their perspective and address the issue. There is no conflict you cannot solve by being empathetic and understanding.
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