You don’t have to be a therapist to think like a therapist. Why, you ask, would I want to think like a therapist? Well, you don’t have to; but you will benefit from it. When you learn to think like a therapist, it gives you new perspective. It helps you to understand things a little more clearly. It also helps you to stay calm, see things from other points of view and actually deal with life’s little issues with a bit more clarity.
Think Using Patterns
When you think that so-and-so always does something, don’t think about what he does; think about when he does it. When you learn to see the pattern in behavior, it helps you to work through the real issues behind that behavior. Perhaps poor behavior happens after a long day of work. Perhaps it’s after spending time with certain people. Whatever it is, recognizing the pattern helps more than recognizing the anger.
Think Like an Adult
Thinking like an adult is a simple matter. It allows you to think more clearly. To do this, stop thinking and using phrases such as, “It’s just fair,” or “I hate you,” or “This stinks.” Try using adult words and being accountable for your own emotions. Taking the childish approach makes it difficult for you to think like a therapist or an adult; which is what’s going to help you fix the situation faster.
Think About the Present
Let go of the past. It’s the past. It happened, it’s in the past. Focus on the present. Even things that seem to link back to the past aren’t really about the past; they’re about how you feel right now. Say you’re dealing with a spouse who cheated; stop focusing on the act and start focusing on how you feel right now.