Sometimes the most innocuous conversations lead to the biggest revelations. This morning, while driving my four-year-old daughter to her Pre-K class, we were talking about school. She told me she loves her job. I asked her what her job was, and she told me school. I asked her why she considers school her job and she told me because daddy gets up every morning to go to his office and it’s his job, and she gets up every morning to go to school because it’s her job. It was then that she asked me what my job is. I thought for a moment. I work from home as a freelance writer, but I don’t consider it my job. I consider it a hobby and my job is taking care of my children.
I explained her that my job is to be the best mommy in the world. It’s my job to make sure my girls are happy, healthy, cared for, loved, and have a lot of fun. It’s my job to make sure she learns, that she is compassionate and kind, and that she always has good food to eat, a lovely home to live in, lots of fun toys, vacations, experiences, and a good attitude. With that in mind, I realized it’s also my job to make sure she always has good self-confidence. As parents, it might be our most important job. Here’s how you can help your kids build their self-confidence.
Make Sure Your Kids Feel Loved
The best way to build a kids’ self-confidence it to make sure they know they are loved. Children who know they are important to people have far more confidence. Practice making sure your kids know you are there for them, that they know you have patience, and that they can always come to you. Of course, your patience may wear thin from time to time, but kids will remember your predominant behavior, so as long as you are there for them most of the time, they’ll be pretty self-confident.
Show Your Own Self-Confidence
If your kids constantly hear you belittling yourself, they will learn the same habit. Even if you don’t have any self-confidence, fake it in front of your kids. Take some time to learn how to build your own confidence level, but never let your kids see your lack of it.
If you are constantly nagging your kids about all they do wrong, they’ll start thinking that they’re bad and that they can’t do anything wrong. You can’t let poor behavior go, but you can spend more time focusing on their good behavior, positive traits, and positive aspects of their personalities. Kids see themselves the way others see them, and if you’re constantly asking them why they can’t be like their kinder older sibling or friend, they’ll start to lose confidence.