Once you have kids, careers take off, life gets hectic, and your schedule is full to overflowing every moment of the day, quality time with your husband gets lost in the shuffle. Don’t feel bad; it happens to everyone at some point. However, you cannot allow that to go on. Your marriage needs time and attention. It’s not always easy, and you may not know where to start. Start by asking your married friends what they do to spend quality time together. I don’t have all the answers, by any means, but I can tell you what works for us and hope that something we do for our marriage will work for yours.
At-Home Date Night
Our kids go to bed at the same time every night, unless we are out with friends and family and then they go to bed a little later than usual. Even on vacation, however, we put them to bed on time. Why? Because that’s when we spend time together. It’s the first time all day we can be together without interruption. It’s easy to fall into the pattern of sitting on the couch and catching up on a good book, work, or television, but we make it a point to put that stuff away a few nights a week. Instead, we grab a bottle of wine and two glasses and we head out to the porch, where we sit together, drink our wine, hold hands, kiss, talk, laugh, whatever. Other times, we skip the great outdoors and head straight to bed.
Take Advantage of Grandparents
We are fortunate to have my mother-in-law and my parents all in the same area, so if we want date night, we just have to ask. What’s even better is that my parents asked if they could keep the kids every other Friday night for a sleepover at their house for all the grandkids. At first we resisted, because that’s a lot of time away. However, we realized that we get two nights a month to ourselves without even having to ask; and the best part is that those two nights are our kids favorite nights. We take advantage. We don’t grocery shop or run errands or do other things on our to-do list those nights; we spend time together.
Consider Day Dates
If your kids go to school, consider skipping out on work one day to spend a little quality time together. Go to breakfast, stay in bed, go golfing. Do whatever you want.