Being a people pleaser sounds like a good thing to be, doesn’t it? It means you are a person likes peace and would rather be flexible than deal with a conflict in your life. You want to make others happy and that is always a good thing, right?
While those things are true, they are not the whole truth about being a people pleaser. If you are a people pleaser then you are denying your true feelings and your true self for others which is not being true to you. You are presenting a dishonest front in order to keep other people happy and they may even be people that are not that important in your life. If you are a people pleaser, it is likely that you want to please most everyone you come in contact with, not just those in your inner circle. Being a people pleaser gets tiring because you are running yourself ragged trying to make others happy and denying your own happiness. Being a people pleaser can spill over into all areas of your life: your personal life, your work life and your family relationships.
The real truth is that while it is good to want to get along with others and see others happy, it is not worth the personal sacrifice you have to make if you are denying yourself in the process. Your feelings matter, too. You will also feel a lot better about yourself when you are honest with others and yourself. Don’t allow others to pressure you back into your people pleaser ways once you break out of this unhealthy pattern. You can state your objections in a kind way when you disagree with what others want but don’t give in just to make the other person happy. You will find that you are a lot happier when you allow yourself to be true to yourself.
Image Credit: St Thomas Blog
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