Make Sure Your Kids Will Always Come To You With Their Problems

We always hope that our kids will turn to us if they find themselves in trouble.  After all, we are their parents and love them more than anyone else does so it stands to reason that we would be the natural first choice, doesn’t it?  Not necessarily.  It turns out that your kids will not come to you if they anticipate a negative reaction.  But there are ways to help increase the chances they do choose to turn to you.

Make it a goal to be open minded.  If your child thinks that you are close minded, they may not come to you to talk if they are questioning continuing a friendship with a bad influence.  They already know what to expect from you.  But if you prove to them that you will listen carefully and consider all of the facts without making a jump decision right off the bat, you greatly increase your odds that your kids will talk to you.

As difficult as it is, try not to overreact or panic when they do come to you with disturbing news.  A strong reaction will tell them that coming to you was a mistake.  Kids watch their parents very carefully and observe more than we realize they do.

Lastly, make sure that your kids know that you will always be on their side.  Make sure that you tell them you will still love them when they make a mistake.  This doesn’t mean that you approve of everything that they do but that you will help them to figure out a solution no matter what the situation is that they have got themselves involved in.  Assure them you will always be there for them and help them to figure out a solution.  It is important to convey this information to them but also stress that they will have responsibility for their mistakes.

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