Deal With An Interfering Grandmother Without Hurting Your Relationship

An interfering grandmother can really make things complicated.  It doesn’t matter if it is your mom or your husband’s mother; both grandmothers can cause quite a few problems.  So, what can you do to fix the situation without hurting your relationship with her?

First of all understand that an interfering grandmother usually means well.  Her intentions are rarely to make you feel inadequate or belittled.  She simply loves the little one that you love too, and wants the best for them.  Try to remember that you are on the same team and you have the same goal; you both want the best for your child.

Secondly, try to allow her to give advice.  Just because she gives advice does not mean you have to take it.  You can weigh each tidbit of advice against your own convictions about what you feel is best for your child and make your own decision.  A good way to handle her advice is to simply say a polite thank you for the advice.  If she questions why you did not follow the path she thought was best, you can simply state that you didn’t feel that was best for your child.  If her advice conflicts with instructions your pediatrician, a coach or teacher has given, you can defer back to that and let them know you are only following what the expert advised you to do.

Sometimes you are left with no choice but to have a candid chat with the interfering grandmother.  If it is your mother-in-law then it would be best if your husband handled the chat or at least was present with you to present a united front.  If it is your own mom, you know the best way to talk to her already.  In either case, assure them of their importance in your child’s life and how much you appreciate them.  Hopefully, with the aid of these tips, the interfering grandmother will no longer be a problem.

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