Dealing with Hypercompetitive Parents and Their Babies

“Oh my goodness! Your little girl is so sweet with her adorable little walk! How long has she been walking?” Asks nosy (read: hypercompetitive) mommy at the park.

“Since about a week after her first birthday, and thank you so much!” You respond kindly, totally aware that your kid is the cutest thing since, well, ever and secretly reveling in the fact that other people share the same opinion.

“Oh my goodness, I’d just die if my little Joe took that long to walk! He’s been walking since he was just over nine months old. I just couldn’t wait any longer for him to be independent, but I guess not all babies develop at the same rate as my little one.” She responds with a cocky smile. Now you punch her in the face. Okay, you don’t, but you probably want to.

Hypercompetitive parents, to put it quite simply, suck. Unfortunately, they are everywhere. Their baby has to be the thinnest and the best looking, or have the chunkiest thighs or the bluest eyes or the biggest vocabulary. You might be well aware of the fact that babies develop at different rates, but with Miss Hypercompetitive Evil Mommy starts passive-aggressively telling you that her baby is better than yours, you might fall off your sensible wagon and start her competitive games.

Don’t! Don’t turn into an evil spawn of mommy-satan! Learn how to handle these competitive parents with ease.

Remember She’s Insecure

The hypercompetitive mom is probably just insecure. She’s looking for a reason to justify the fact that her baby is smart or cute, and she needs to feel that she is doing a good job as a parent. Maybe she doesn’t feel like a good mom and she needs to find a way to make others think she is. Whatever the reason, just remember that she’s probably insecure and you don’t want to be the same way.

Your Baby is Fine

Just because someone else’s baby did something faster than yours doesn’t mean yours is broken, and you need to remember that when competitive mom starts running her mouth. Just repeat to yourself that your baby is perfect and forget what she has to say.

Just Smile

When she’s running off about her baby’s superior advanced development, just smile and try not to feel bad for yourself or your baby. Save your pity for her baby, because he’s the one who has to deal with her on a daily basis for the rest of his forever.


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