Dealing With Controlling Parents Without Being Unkind

Controlling parents can be very difficult to deal with.  After all, they are the very people that raised you and you love deeply.  You don’t want to hurt their feelings.  But on the other hand, you don’t want them to run your life.  You need them to cut the apron strings and give you the freedom to live your own life.

Controlling parents may very well be that way throughout your college years and even into your adulthood years when you are married and raising children.  More than likely they will be controlling parents until you deal with the situation.  So how can you do that?

Express that you love them and you are so grateful for their opinions.  Let them know that you value their wisdom and experience.  Then let them know that you have to make your own independent decision after thinking about all of the information you have.

Don’t tell them everything.  They do not need to know every detail that goes on in your life.  Of course you want to share the big milestones with them and big news in your life but if you call them complaining about every little issue, you raise the temptation for them to jump in and try to handle it for you.  You are practically asking for them to be controlling parents when you go to them with everything.

Instead, ask them for advice when you truly want it.  For example, maybe you can’t get your rolls to raise like your mom did.  Perhaps you want to know your Dad’s secret to dealing with squeaky doors.  The point is, you all them the freedom to advise you in small inconsequential situations and it can help them to break the habit from advising when you don’t ask.

To find out one take on dealing with controlling parents, you may enjoy this article by Daily Strength.

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