15 Celebrity Baby Names Probably Not on the Royal’s Short List


Celebrity baby names are always an interesting subject. With the impending birth of The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge’s first baby, celebrity baby names are the talk of the town at the moment. What with the soon-to-be prince or princess be named? Will his or her elegant parents stick with a classic or will they break tradition and choose something out of this world for their royal baby? We don’t know yet, and we may not know for a few more weeks. However, you can read on to find out 16 crazy celebrity baby names that probably are not on the Duke and Duchess’ short list.

Actress Gwyneth Paltrow arrives at the 2012 Vanity Fair Oscar party in West Hollywood


Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin must have heard that an apple a day will keep the doctor away. Unfortunately, they missed the memo that they’re supposed to eat one; not name their daughter after one.


Pilot Inspektor

Isn’t that a job title? No? Jason Lee is hilarious, and the same applies to his choice of name. This poor kid just doesn’t have a future. I mean, who does with a name like that? I vote for homeschool.



Nicolas Cage is a great actor and he’s a Coppola. However, what he’s not is good at naming children. The comic obsessed actor named his child after a superhero. That’s all fine and dandy, but there are so many other characters with way better names.


Fifi Trixibelle

No, you have not accidently stumbled upon a porn site. This is an actual name of an actual person that actual people chose (although that is questionable). The daughter of Paula Yates and Bob Geldof will suffer the rest of her life with people wondering if this is her stage name.

EXCLUSIVE: David Duchovny, Tea Leoni and family in Malibu


On the list of really bad celebrity baby names, this one might not be the worst. Kyd, kid, whatever. David Duchovny and Tea Leoni chose the name Kyd for a reason. Perhaps so they don’t forget their kid’s name?



Surprisingly, Courteney Cox and David Arquette did not choose something more insane that Coco. Now that I think about it, however, it does seem sad that the name Coco doesn’t register as the worst name ever. Or probably even the top 10 worst names ever. That’s sad.


Sage Moonblood

Well, now, hmmm. Sly Stallone named his child Sage Moonblood. Apparently this action star has been hit in the head one too many times. Who knew he did his own stunt work.


Tu Morrow

Oh yes, you read that correctly. Numb3rs star Rob Morrow named his kid Tu. Tu Morrow. Tomorrow. It’s funny, but it’s not funny. It’s not funny to do that to a child.



Excuse me while I giggle and giggle and giggle some more. Jermajesty. It’s funny because it doesn’t seem weird when you consider this is a product of Jermaine Jackson.


Moxie Crimefighter

We all need a superhero name, right? Wrong. So wrong. We really do not. However, magician Penn Jillette apparently thought his kid needed some sort of super cool name, perhaps because it will keep kids from making fun?


Blue Angel

U2’s The Edge (do we have a real name for this guy, anyone?) named his kid Blue Angel. Angel, okay, but blue? I guess, however, if he planned on having more kids he could have gone through the rainbow until he had his very own Roy G Biv.

Celebrities Attend The New Jersey Nets v New York Knicks Game - February 20, 2012

Blue Ivy

Apparently Jay-Z and Beyonce missed the memo when the rest of the world raised a questionable eyebrow at The Edge’s choice in this name and decided that they’d make it awesome. They didn’t. Even Jay and Bey can’t do Blue justice.


Moon Unit

Well….just well. Really, that’s all I’ve got. I have no idea what Frank Zappa was thinking here. Or what his baby mama was thinking here.


Diva Thin Muffin

Again, a product of Frank Zappa. It’s just….it’s just weird. Anyone have any idea how one puts these three names together and comes up with a full name?



Yet again, Frank Zappa, I ask you what you were thinking naming an innocent child Dweezil. Did you want him to grow up and make it onto America’s Most Wanted? Because that’s kind of what it feels like to me.



When your name is Forest, it really only makes sense to name your child Ocean, does it not? Forest Whittaker and his lovely wife chose this not so common name for their son for some reason. I assume they have a reason. There has to be a reason, right?


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