Tom Foster
The 15 ways narcissists behave when they lose control of you are comical but serious. There are several ways people try to control others.
They’ll start a pity party
Playing the victim card is kind of risky since there’s not much else to do after this. But gaining sympathy and strengthening your emotional ties is a trick that many individuals know too well.
They turn your friends on you
A divided house is easier to manage, and out of the many ways narcissists behave, this one is part of the average playbook. If they can make certain you don’t have anyone to lean on, it’s better for them.
Let the gaslighting begin
The way narcissists behave, one would think that they’re genuinely concerned about people. But the truth is usually they’re on a fact-finding mission to use something against you later.
They know how to play vulnerable
For a narcissist, playing vulnerable is like playing a role in a series or a movie. They know how to gauge the reactions of the people around them and what will work the best.
Gifts and favors become emotional weapons
Beware narcissists bearing gifts. These are strategically-used offerings that come with a heavy price tag.
Planting doubt is easy for a narcissist
The moment you start questioning your own judgment is a sure sign that you’re listening to the wrong person. The way narcissists behave is very divide and conquer, and they’re naturally skilled at this.
Seeking validation is their way to power up
The moment a narcissist feels their control slipping they will look to external sources. This will help to reinforce the manipulation of your feelings and maintain their dominance.
Subtle criticisms cut like knives
Passive-aggressive digs designed to strike your self-esteem in ways that you might not notice are common. They’ll pretend that they’re saying these things for your good, but it’s not hard to see through this.
Narcissists aren’t above becoming martyrs
They’ll fall on their sword for you, or at least they say they will. This is another tactic aimed at making you feel guilty, and another way narcissists behave when they feel pressed.
Indifference is another tool
Those who don’t see this tool coming either never had siblings or are less observant than is necessary. The moment that emotional withdrawal is used is when a lot of people fall on their faces.
They claim that they’re misunderstood in their wisdom
Kind of like the old martial arts theories and legends, this is something that should have faded once the internet was a thing. But sadly, some people still think that these ‘misunderstood sages’ are valid when they discuss how much they know.
Your goals and achievements become theirs
Yeah, some people actually do this. They’ll claim that they pushed you, they inspired you, they…whatever they needed to do to get you there.
Selective memory is a neat trick
Anytime you talk to a narcissist about something they’ve said or done, especially if it’s nothing that worked, they might develop a sudden case of amnesia. It’s a way to gaslight you and doubt your own memories.
Time to fabricate an emergency
How likely are you to stay mad with someone during an emergency? This is the type of manipulation that’s high-risk, but narcissists will use it when necessary.
They’re not above acting like intellectual snobs
The trick with this tool is that a narcissist does need to be smart enough to use it. A good bluffer can make it work, but intellectual superiority requires a lot of upkeep and confidence.
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