Tom Foster
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15 signs you’re too independent to be in a relationship are indicators that you aren’t much of a people person. You’re not unlikable, it’s just tough to get close to you.
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You seek out reasons to end a relationship.
Some people would call this toxic. The truth is that you feel like it’s a severe blow to your independence.
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You don’t want your partner’s help.
A relationship is a lot of give and take, and if you can’t stand the giving part then it’s likely that you’re way too self-reliant. Accepting help isn’t a weakness, but you can’t stand that line of thinking.
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You don’t know how to express yourself
There’s a desire to let your walls down to get to know people, but there’s also the thought that you’ll end up vulnerable to others. There are a lot of reasons that this happens, but whatever it is you don’t want to expose yourself that much.
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You will make up a reason to leave a place
Some people don’t like being around crowds, even small ones. In this instance, your mind starts churning out ideas that will be acceptable to others when it comes time to excuse yourself from a gathering.
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You accuse your SO of being needy
There are varying degrees of this situation, as sometimes an SO is too needy. But if all they tell you is that you should open up a little and you take it as their need to suffocate you, then you might see them as clingy.
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Compromising is not your thing
If things are typically ‘my way or the highway’ with you, then you aren’t ready for a relationship. When you’re with someone there always needs to be room to negotiate.
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You favor people who think like you do
This is an odd occurrence since you view emotionally unavailable people as perfect since they think very much like you do, that there’s no room for intimacy. Unfortunately, if your mind changes and you decide you want someone to pursue you, then these folks become less appealing no matter how much you try to idealize them.
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Your partner’s needs aren’t that important to you
When your priorities are anything and everything that keeps you rolling solo, then you don’t need a relationship. If this is the path you choose then your partner might as well be a piece of decor in your home.
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You’re not going to adjust your schedule for anyone
When you’re used to solo living it’s tough to give it up. If you find yourself in a relationship though, your schedule will need to readjust if you’re dedicated to someone else.
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You don’t trust your partner
You like the way you do things, and that’s fine. But if you’re with someone then it’s fair to say that they’re going to do it differently. If you’re constantly at odds with the way your SO does things then they’ll feel that you don’t trust them.
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You’re incredibly stubborn
Being alone becomes a habit, that is a guarantee. But when you attach your life to another person’s it’s time to let go of certain habits, or at least soften them a bit. Being too independent can make one forget what it’s like to give a little.
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You’re not big on sharing your space
When it comes to personal space it’s very tough to share if you’re too independent. If your SO takes up a good deal of space you might feel smothered. If you like a lot of open space then you probably don’t need an SO.
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When things get hard you run
There are a lot of things that I’d like to say about this, especially as one of the many people who have had people run out on them. But to be polite, if you don’t like confrontations with an SO and constantly avoid conflict, then you don’t need another person in your life.
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You don’t want to be a part of shared activities
If this is repellent to you, there’s an easy solution. Buy a dog and die alone, as Kevin Samuels has said many times in the past. Sure, it sounds kind of brutal, but if you can’t bring yourself to share your life with others, that’s one of the most obvious paths for someone who’s too independent.
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