People Who Lack Empathy Often Say These 9 Phrases

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. It helps us connect with people and build strong relationships. However, not everyone shows empathy in their conversations. Some people say things that reveal they struggle to care about how others feel. Recognizing these phrases can help you understand who truly listens and who might need to work on their compassion.

1. “You’re too sensitive”

When someone tells you that you’re being too sensitive, they’re dismissing your feelings instead of trying to understand them. This phrase shuts down communication and makes you feel like your emotions don’t matter. It’s a way of avoiding responsibility for hurtful words or actions.

People who lack empathy often use this phrase because they don’t want to deal with emotional conversations. They prefer to blame you for reacting rather than consider how their behavior affected you. This creates distance in relationships and prevents real connection.

A more empathetic response would acknowledge your feelings and show genuine concern. True friends and caring people validate emotions rather than criticize them.

2. “I don’t care about your problems”

Bluntly stating that someone’s problems don’t matter is one of the clearest signs of low empathy. Everyone faces challenges, and sharing them with others is how we build trust and support. When someone refuses to listen, it shows they only care about themselves.

This phrase hurts because it makes people feel alone and unimportant. Relationships thrive on mutual care and understanding. Without that foundation, connections become shallow and one-sided.

Empathetic individuals make time to listen, even when life gets busy. They understand that being there for others strengthens bonds. Small acts of listening can make a huge difference in someone’s day.

3. “Get over it already”

Healing from difficult experiences takes time, and everyone moves at their own pace. Telling someone to just get over something ignores the complexity of human emotions. It pressures them to hide their feelings instead of working through them properly.

This phrase reveals impatience and a lack of understanding about emotional processing. People who say this often feel uncomfortable with others’ pain and want it to disappear quickly. They prioritize their own comfort over someone else’s healing journey.

Compassionate people recognize that recovery isn’t instant. They offer patience and support without judgment, creating safe spaces for others to heal authentically.

4. “That’s your fault”

Quick to assign blame, people lacking empathy rarely consider circumstances beyond someone’s control. Life is complicated, and most situations involve multiple factors. Immediately blaming someone ignores context and shows unwillingness to understand their perspective.

This phrase damages relationships because it creates defensiveness and resentment. Instead of solving problems together, it divides people into winners and losers. Nobody wants to open up to someone who will just criticize them.

Understanding individuals ask questions before making judgments. They consider different viewpoints and share responsibility when appropriate. This approach builds trust and encourages honest communication between people.

5. “Why are you making such a big deal?”

What seems small to one person might be huge to another, depending on their experiences and values. Minimizing someone’s concerns tells them their perspective doesn’t count. It’s a way of controlling the conversation and avoiding difficult topics.

People use this phrase when they don’t want to engage with someone’s emotions. They’d rather dismiss the issue than take time to understand why it matters. This behavior pushes people away and damages trust over time.

Empathetic responses involve curiosity about why something matters to someone else. Even if you don’t fully understand, showing interest demonstrates respect and care.

6. “I’m just being honest”

Honesty without kindness is just cruelty in disguise. While truthfulness matters, how you deliver information shows whether you care about the other person’s feelings. Using honesty as an excuse allows people to say hurtful things without taking responsibility.

This phrase often follows insensitive comments that could have been phrased more gently. People lacking empathy don’t consider how their words land. They focus only on expressing their thoughts, regardless of the emotional impact.

Thoughtful communicators balance truth with compassion. They find ways to be honest while still respecting others’ feelings and maintaining dignity in conversations.

7. “Everyone goes through that”

Just because something is common doesn’t mean it’s easy to handle. Comparing someone’s pain to universal experiences minimizes what they’re going through. Each person’s journey is unique, even when facing similar challenges.

This phrase shows unwillingness to acknowledge individual struggles. People who lack empathy often generalize experiences instead of recognizing personal circumstances. They miss opportunities to provide meaningful support by treating everyone’s problems as identical.

Caring individuals acknowledge both the commonality and uniqueness of experiences. They validate feelings while offering relevant support, making people feel heard rather than dismissed.

8. “I have it worse”

Turning someone’s struggle into a competition about who has it harder completely misses the point of sharing. When someone opens up, they need support, not a reminder that others suffer too. This response shifts focus away from their needs.

People who constantly one-up others’ problems can’t handle not being the center of attention. They view conversations as opportunities to talk about themselves rather than chances to connect. This behavior prevents genuine emotional bonding.

Empathetic listeners give others space to express themselves fully. They understand that acknowledging one person’s pain doesn’t diminish anyone else’s experiences or struggles.

9. “Just think positive”

Toxic positivity isn’t support—it’s denial. When someone’s going through real pain, forcing them to “just stay positive” invalidates what they’re feeling. People don’t choose to feel bad. Emotions are real, and they deserve space.

Toxic positivity prevents honest conversations about difficulties. People who can’t handle negative emotions use this phrase to avoid uncomfortable feelings. They prioritize maintaining a cheerful facade over providing genuine support.

Truly supportive people accept the full range of human emotions. They sit with others in difficult moments without rushing to fix or change how they feel naturally.