Chloe Peterson
17 Fictional Characters Who’d Be Absolute Nightmares to Date
Dating can be complicated enough without adding superpowers, murderous tendencies, or toxic personality traits into the mix.
Some fictional characters may seem charming at first glance, but a closer look reveals red flags the size of billboards.
Whether they’re controlling, manipulative, or downright dangerous, these characters prove that sometimes the worst relationships are the ones that never leave the screen.
1. Ryan Howard from The Office (2005–2013)
Ryan treats relationships like stepping stones to success.
His partners exist solely to make him look good, boost his confidence, or advance his career goals.
Accountability is a foreign concept to him.
When things go wrong, he’ll blame everyone except himself, twisting situations to maintain his inflated self-image.
His ambition overshadows basic kindness.
Manipulation comes naturally to Ryan.
He’ll say whatever sounds good in the moment, make promises he never intends to keep, and disappear the second someone stops being useful.
Dating him means constant disappointment wrapped in designer clothes and empty words.
2. Rose Armitage from Get Out (2017)
Rose perfects the art of appearing sweet while hiding sinister intentions.
Her smile masks calculated cruelty, and every romantic gesture serves a darker purpose.
She weaponizes affection brilliantly.
Compliments, dates, and declarations of love become tools for luring victims into feeling safe before revealing her true nature.
Trust becomes the trap.
Behind those charming eyes lies someone capable of breathtaking betrayal.
Romance, for Rose, is performance art designed to manipulate and destroy.
Dating her would mean constantly wondering which version is real until discovering, too late, that none of them were.
3. Joffrey Baratheon from Game of Thrones (2011–2014)
Cruelty defines Joffrey’s every interaction.
He finds genuine pleasure in causing pain, humiliation, and fear, treating romantic partners as possessions rather than people.
His entitlement knows no bounds.
Born into power, he believes everyone exists to serve his whims, and disagreement warrants punishment.
Respect is something he demands but never offers.
Sadism replaces affection in his emotional vocabulary.
A relationship with Joffrey would involve constant walking on eggshells, never knowing what minor infraction might trigger his violent temper.
Love and terror would become indistinguishable, creating a nightmare disguised as royalty.
4. Marcy D’Arcy from Married… with Children (1987–1997)
Marcy’s superiority complex makes genuine connection nearly impossible.
She approaches relationships with constant judgment, always finding fault and rarely offering warmth or understanding.
Her combative nature turns everyday conversations into battles.
Simple disagreements escalate into wars, and she’ll hold grudges over the smallest perceived slights for years.
Empathy seems permanently switched off.
She prioritizes being right over being kind, making partners feel inadequate and criticized rather than supported.
Dating Marcy would mean enduring endless lectures about your shortcomings while she remains blind to her own flaws.
5. Sir from Found (2023–present)
Sir confuses imprisonment with devotion.
His version of love involves complete control, surveillance, and removal of all freedom under the guise of protection and care.
Obsession drives every action he takes.
What he calls affection is actually coercion, manipulation, and psychological warfare designed to break down independence and create dependence.
His dangerous delusion that captivity equals love makes him terrifying.
Escape becomes the only goal, yet he interprets any attempt at freedom as betrayal.
A relationship with Sir isn’t partnership but rather survival, where every day brings new methods of control.
6. Lord Voldemort from Harry Potter (2001–2011)
Voldemort literally cannot experience love.
His pursuit of power destroyed his capacity for human connection, making emotional partnership biologically impossible for him.
He views people as tools or obstacles, nothing more.
Relationships serve only strategic purposes, and loyalty flows in one direction.
Empathy is weakness in his worldview.
Fear and domination replace affection in his interactions.
Dating Voldemort would mean being treated as property at best, collateral damage at worst.
His obsession with immortality and power leaves zero room for the vulnerability and trust that healthy relationships require.
7. Homelander from The Boys (2019–present)
Imagine dating someone who needs constant praise and worship just to function normally.
Homelander embodies the worst kind of narcissism, demanding complete adoration while offering zero emotional support in return.
His superhuman strength comes with an equally super-sized ego.
Rejection sends him into violent rages, and he views romantic partners as tools for boosting his image rather than real people with feelings.
Control defines every interaction he has. Love, to him, means owning someone completely, and disagreement equals betrayal worthy of punishment.
Any relationship with him would feel less like partnership and more like captivity with occasional compliments.
8. Glinda the Good from Wicked (2024)
Glinda prioritizes appearances above authenticity.
Her obsession with popularity and public perception means relationships serve her image rather than providing genuine emotional connection.
Surface-level charm hides emotional shallowness.
She’ll be your friend when it’s convenient or makes her look good, but disappear when real support is needed.
Responsibility takes a backseat to maintaining her perfect reputation.
She avoids difficult conversations and uncomfortable truths, preferring to keep things light and pretty.
Dating Glinda would mean always playing second fiddle to her public persona, never receiving the depth and emotional honesty that real partnerships require.
9. Dexter Morgan from Dexter (2006–2013)
Dexter’s charming exterior conceals profound emotional detachment.
He mimics human feelings rather than experiencing them, making genuine intimacy fundamentally impossible despite his best efforts.
His secret life as a vigilante serial killer creates unavoidable barriers to honesty.
Trust becomes a joke when your partner is hiding bodies and leading a violent double life.
Even his attempts at normalcy feel calculated.
He follows learned patterns of behavior rather than authentic emotion, treating relationships like science experiments.
Dating Dexter would mean loving someone who can never truly love you back, always wondering what darkness lurks beneath his practiced smile.
10. Lori Grimes from The Walking Dead (2010–2013)
Indecision defines Lori’s romantic life.
She bounces between partners, unable to commit fully while creating emotional chaos for everyone involved in her love triangle.
Her inconsistency makes stability impossible.
One day she wants one thing, the next day something completely different, leaving partners confused and hurt by her constantly changing feelings.
Communication breakdowns follow her everywhere.
Instead of honest conversations, she creates drama through mixed signals and poor choices.
Dating Lori would mean never knowing where you stand, navigating constant turmoil, and competing for attention even during a zombie apocalypse.
11. Edward Cullen from Twilight (2008–2012)
Edward’s protectiveness crosses into disturbing territory.
He watches his girlfriend sleep without permission, monitors her constantly, and makes decisions about her safety without consulting her.
Control masquerades as romance throughout their relationship.
He removes her car engine to prevent her from seeing friends, dictates who she can spend time with, and isolates her under the guise of keeping her safe.
His century of life experience creates an uncomfortable power imbalance.
Dating Edward would mean accepting surveillance as love, losing autonomy in exchange for protection, and never having privacy or independence again.
12. Ivy Mayfair-Richards from American Horror Story: Cult (2017)
Ivy’s manipulation reaches chilling levels.
She orchestrates elaborate psychological torture against her own partner, using ideology and extremism to justify emotional cruelty.
Her agenda always takes priority over loyalty or trust.
She’ll betray confidences, twist truths, and gaslight relentlessly to achieve her goals, showing zero remorse for the damage caused.
Political beliefs become weapons in her hands.
She uses fear and manipulation to control rather than communicate, creating an environment where paranoia replaces partnership.
Dating Ivy would mean constant mind games, never knowing what’s real, and discovering that love ranked far below her personal mission.
13. Archie Andrews from Riverdale (2017–2023)
Good intentions pave Archie’s road to relationship disaster.
His savior complex drives him to make reckless decisions that endanger himself and everyone around him.
His poor judgment creates constant drama.
He jumps into situations without thinking, makes impulsive choices, and rarely considers consequences until after the damage is done.
Well-meaning doesn’t equal reliable.
Archie will prioritize saving strangers over nurturing his relationship, chase danger instead of building stability, and leave partners feeling neglected while he plays hero.
Dating him would mean endless worry, frequent abandonment for his latest crusade, and cleaning up messes he creates with his heart.
14. Kathryn Merteuil from Cruel Intentions (1999)
Kathryn turns romance into a ruthless competitive sport.
She manipulates emotions with surgical precision, viewing relationships as games to win rather than connections to nurture.
Calculating coldness defines her approach to love.
Every gesture serves a strategic purpose, every confession hides an ulterior motive, and genuine vulnerability is weakness to exploit.
She’s emotionally predatory by design.
Hearts are toys to break, reputations are weapons to wield, and consequences matter only when they affect her.
Dating Kathryn would mean becoming a pawn in her elaborate schemes, discovering too late that you were never a partner but rather a target.
15. Ted Mosby from How I Met Your Mother (2005–2014)
Ted’s romantic idealism becomes suffocating pressure.
He believes so strongly in destiny and soulmates that he overlooks what his actual partners want and need.
His fixation on finding “the one” means he’s often more in love with the idea of love than with the real person in front of him.
He projects fantasies onto relationships instead of accepting reality.
Grand gestures replace genuine listening.
Ted will plan elaborate romantic moments while ignoring clear signals that he’s moving too fast or in the wrong direction.
Dating him would mean feeling like a character in his predetermined love story rather than an equal partner writing your own narrative together.
16. The Joker from Batman (multiple films, 1989–2022)
Chaos defines the Joker’s existence.
He thrives on destruction, unpredictability, and violence, making any semblance of stability or safety completely impossible.
His relationships are built on abuse and manipulation.
What he calls love is actually obsession mixed with cruelty, where affection and violence become indistinguishable.
He’s incapable of partnership or compromise.
Every interaction serves his anarchic worldview, and anyone close to him becomes a victim or accomplice.
Dating the Joker would mean constant danger, psychological torture disguised as devotion, and the certainty that emotional destruction is not just possible but guaranteed.
He doesn’t do relationships; he does casualties.
17. Piper Chapman from Orange Is the New Black (2013–2019)
Piper’s self-centeredness sabotages every relationship she enters.
Her personal growth and comfort consistently take priority over commitment, loyalty, or her partners’ emotional needs.
Indecision plagues her romantic life.
She bounces between people, unable to commit fully while stringing multiple partners along, creating unnecessary pain for everyone involved.
She frames selfishness as self-discovery.
While she’s busy finding herself, her partners are left dealing with broken promises and half-hearted affection.
Dating Piper would mean accepting that you’ll always rank below her journey of personal exploration, waiting for attention she’s too focused on herself to give.
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