It’s the biggest role in the wedding aside from the bride (and maybe even more so than the groom); the position of Maid of Honor is the CEO of all wedding parties. It’s the Donald Trump of the wedding world. It’s the best position to have; except that it’s usually the worst job to have in the wedding because you’re the bride’s glorified you-know-what. Being the Maid of Honor makes you sound amazing. It makes everyone understand that you are the best friend, the closest person on earth to the bride. You are the next most important person to the woman getting married than the man she is marrying, and that means you are the third coolest person at the wedding (except for Great Aunt Sally after she has her third mimosa at brunch thinking it’s straight up OJ). The Maid of Honor is a J-O-B. It’s work. It’s a position that only few can do with class and elegance, and even those women are secretly dying on the inside. At the risk of making the job sound less than fabulous, being the MOH is actually a lovely experience, but some of it is going to make you just a bit crazy. Here are the 10 most annoying aspects you’ll deal with as the MOH in any wedding.
Oh yes, this is probably going to happen. Not all bridesmaids are lazy but you’ll probably deal with at least one of them. And you might even find that if you are a detail oriented, on top of your game kind of MOH, your bridesmaids let you take the lead role and they sort of hide in the shadows and only help when they are forced with no way out. You can’t do it all, they know it, but they might try and let you.
A Difficult Bride
She might be a little difficult from time to time. It’s okay, since she is only planning the most stressful event of her entire life. But she shouldn’t be difficult all the time. If she’s a raging bridezilla, you have to go ahead and make some serious decisions of your own before the big day arrives. It is her day, but that is no excuse for her to treat everyone else like a minion.
An Insulted Groom
He’s upset because the bride won’t listen to him, or because his mom wants something one way and his bride another; and you are his way out. He will tell you, ask you to deal with it and then wash his hands of the entire situation. And now you have to be the bad cop to someone.
Parents Who Try to Convert You
They want things their way, and they know you are the best way to the bride’s heart. The in-laws might be really bad about this. They don’t want their son upset, so they might ask you to do their bidding and upset people on their behalf. Do not fall for this. Do not!
There are a lot of details that go into planning a wedding, and you’re going to be in charge of several of them. Your job is a big one, and the details are going to bog you down and make you feel a bit like you’re going stir crazy and insane. It’s okay; just take a deep breath and know that it’s all worth it in the end.
Buying that Dress You’ll Never Wear Again
It’s a less than ideal part of being the MOH or bridesmaid in a wedding. You hate the idea of spending hundreds of dollars on a dress as a general rule, but especially one you know you will never, ever again wear. It’s just life. Buy it, wear it with a smile and then see if you can salvage a bit of your money back selling it online. I hear it’s what bridal party members do when the big day is over.
Aside from the dress, there are so many millions of little things you have to pay for. It’s expensive to be the MOH. You’ll throw showers, bachelorette parties, buy gifts, buy clothes and shoes and accessories, pay for meals and drinks and so many other things on your bridal adventures. We would say you might spend at least $2500, maybe even more to be part of this wedding.
There is so much on your shoulders on this day that it’s sometimes a bit overwhelming and overbearing. It happens, and it’s all right to feel overwhelmed. While we don’t recommend you tell the bride you can’t do it all and that you’re overwhelmed, we do recommend you reason with her and let her know that you’d love to ask for some help from someone else so that you can get it all handled for her. She’s likely a reasonable woman with the understanding that your life is very busy and hectic outside of the wedding.
Some brides go nuts. They go from your best friend with a sweet personality, fun sense of humor and forever amazing wit to a crazy, whiny, annoying woman who cannot do anything without complaint. It’s annoying, I know; but it happens to many brides. Just try to remember she’s under a lot of stress and she’s got people pulling at her from every direction right now, and that means she’s going to need you to be there for her to keep her grounded. And if that doesn’t work, she’ll probably go back to normal when the wedding is over.
Being the MOH means your bride friend expects a lot from you, and the stress of not wanting to let her down on her big day is big time. It’s not even remotely funny how stressful it is to feel this kind of pressure, but it will end. Just take a deep breath and remember that you’ve got this under control and that you can do it. You are strong and awesome.
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