20 Historical Facts We Think Are Total Lies

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Historically speaking, so many things we thought were true turned out to be complete lies. Remember the planet Pluto? That one hurts, doesn’t it? I mean, I grew up thinking it was the smallest planet and my kids don’t believe me when I say it was once considered a planet. I see the, “Mom sure is a moron,” look in their eyes when we talk about it. The same goes for phone cords and ‘car’ phones. They don’t believe me, and it is fine. But there are some historical facts we all grew up believing were the absolute truth, but now we think they are total lies. No, we know they are total lies. In fact, we have a list of ‘facts’ there were professionally debunked and are now known as total lies.

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Van Gogh Probably Did not Cut Off His Own Ear

Let’s get straight right now; it was not his entire ear that was cut off, just a small portion of it. And while he officially stated that he did cut it off on his own, there is some proof that the man with which he was living and engaged in a very volatile relationship actually cut it off. It’s been said that the man was an expert fencer and in the midst of a heated battle between the two, he accidentally cut off Van Gogh’s ear. The two told authorities the artist did it as a cover up.

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Twinkies Are Not Good Forever

Have you ever heard the myth that Twinkies are literally good forever? As in when the company decided that they would stop making Twinkies and people began buying them like they were going out of style (they really were), thinking that they could hoard them forever, they were wrong. There is actually a relatively short shelf-life on these little treats (I don’t care for them, so it’s difficult for me to call them treats). They’re actually only good for about a month and a half.

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Marie Antoinette Did Not Advise All To Eat Cake

The thought the Marie Antoinette once famously uttered the phrase, “Let them eat cake,” has recently been attributed to falsified rumors. The phrase was actually a part of a book written by a famous – at the time – author that was released with Anoinette was a small girl. She did not utter the phrase on her own. She might have said it, but it was not ‘her’ phrase as it’s been so commonly thought for so many years.

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Christopher Columbus Did Not Discover America

It was thought for so long that Columbus sailed the ocean blue and discovered the US in 1492, but it appears that new information has falsified this information for us. In fact, it appears that the Vikings actually explored what is now the United States from their home in Greenland and discovered the land long before Columbus considering they were there for a little over 500 years until 1500. It seems that the Vikings explored as far south as modern day North Carolina.

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Napoleon Bonaparte Wasn’t Short

It’s been said in many a history books that Mr. Bonaparte was a very short man. In fact, for some reason this is a very important fact about Bonaparte. Except that it is actually not a fact. It’s completely untrue. Bonaparte was an important historical figure, but he was also of average height. The myth that he was short clearly came from someone a lot taller – remember, many things in life are all about perception.

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The Great Wall Of China Is Not Visible From Space

So many people think that if they get to go to the moon they’ll be able to see the Great Wall of China. Now, let’s be clear. It’s a very big wall. I mean, it’s quite large. But the Sears Tower is really tall and wide, and we can’t see that from space. You also cannot see the Great Wall of China from Space. For one, it’s the same color as the landscaping and terrain around it, so that makes things a bit difficult. Also, most of us will never go to space, so we can’t see it from up there anyway.

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Ninja’s Did Not Wear Costumes

There is a myth that’s been perpetuated for many years that ninja assassins wear these dark black costumes that cover their faces, but it’s not true. In fact, those are people who dressed just like anyone else. After all, they had to get close enough to a target to actually kill them, so it would probably raise some red flags if a person dressed as, well, a ninja were to approach and make it seem like they were up to no good.

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George Washington Carver Didn’t Invent Peanut Butter

For many years, people have believed that George Washington Carver is the genius behind peanut butter (and therefore, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups) but he did not invent this delicious, tasty treat. It’s been historically proven that South Americans were mashing their peanuts into paste as far back as 950 B.C., which was just a *few* years before George Washington Carver was born and capable of creating anything.

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Ostrich’s Don’t Bury Their Heads From Fear

Ostrich rumor has it that these magnificent creatures bury their heads in the sand when they are afraid. It’s been said they do this so that other people do not see them there – even though they’re quite large and we totally see them there. But I guess they thought that if they can’t see us, we can’t see them, right? It turns out, they don’t bury their heads out of fear at all. They just enjoy it. It’s nothing to do with the fear they feel for predators or the unknown.

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Orson Welles Didn’t Perpetuate Widespread Panic About Aliens

When he did his famous broadcast so many years ago, it was said that widespread panic ensued and the country began to believe that an alien invasion was occurring right away. It’s long been thought that, but it turns out that it’s not true in the least. There is no alien invasion (obviously) and it turns out that people were not panicked because of his very infamous broadcast so many years ago.

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People Didn’t Believe The Earth Was Flat Columbus Started His Voyage

Where this notion came from was actually a long time after Columbus set sail to discover lands that you already learned were actually discovered by someone else. In fact, it was at some point in the 19^th century that people began to believe that other people believed the earth was flat way back when. It wasn’t true. They did not think that the earth was flat and they did not assume Columbus would fall off the edge of the earth into the great unknown. Let’s get it right, history books.

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Goldfish Actually Have A Long Memory

Someone once said that goldfish can only remember things for about 3 seconds, which makes them pretty much obsolete in life. It’s not true. Goldfish actually have a very long memory and this was proven by researchers and people who felt it was scientifically necessary to spend time, money and effort figuring out what goldfish can and cannot remember and for how long. How this affects our lives in any way is beyond me.

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Vitamin C Does Not Prevent Colds

There’s a long-standing rumor that people who drink or eat plenty of Vitamin C can ward off a cold. In fact, I remember my parents encouraging me to drink orange juice when I was growing up so that I would not become ill. Turns out that Vitamin C, while very good for our bodies, has nothing to do with how much illness we suffer or how many colds we come down with. Instead of getting that Vitamin C, try washing your hands more often; it’s pretty effective.

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Albert Einsten Was Actually A Great Student

We were all taught that the historical genius Albert Einstein was a horrible student who actually failed mathematics when he was growing up. Well guess what? What’ just not true. It’s something we say to our kids and students to remind them that they aren’t stupid even though they’re not doing their school work (why do people do that?). Einstein was a genius – literally. He was a great student and he did not fail. In fact, he was marked as a bad student because he frequently talked back to teachers and corrected their mistakes. What? No one likes to hear from a child they are incorrect.

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Vaccines Do Not Cause Autism

It’s not a long-term historical fact by any means, but it’s something many people have mistakenly believed for the past few years. The truth is that vaccines do not cause autism. And for those who use blogs and other non-medical professional websites created by just anyone to get their medical information are doing a great disservice to their children. In fact, medical information should come from medical professionals (and sites that end primarily in .edu and .gov, FYI). Autism is not caused by vaccinations and it’s been proven time and time again.

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Global Warming Is Not A Myth

Some people believe that everything is a myth perpetuated by different industries so that they can create a profit. It’s been said that global warming is not real, it’s just corporate America’s way of making more money by marketing products as “eco-friendly” so that they can increase their bottom line and live the good life. It’s not the case; global warming is actually true. True story.

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Turkey Does Not Make You Sleepy

Anyone ever feel tired after eating Thanksgiving dinner? Well, it’s not because you ate turkey. It’s actually probably because you woke up early to cook and then spent the rest of the day goofing off, drinking too much and waiting around starving so that you could make more room to eat. You’re stuffed and tired because the anticipation is over. Also, it’s time to clean the kitchen, so that means everyone is actually very tired and absolutely cannot help.

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Fingernails And Hair Do Not Keep Growing After Death

Someone perpetuated a myth at one point that a body will continue to grow hair and nails after it’s been declared dead, but this is not true. It’s something that is just not possible, and it’s been medically proven on many occasions. So for those who think that you can keep your nails looking good after you die, you’re actually wrong. They’re going to look just like they do when you actually die.

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Earthworms Cut In Half Do Not Regrow

First and foremost, who actually cares? I have no idea what significance this has on the lives of anyone, or even why we care. But for some reason, we do. So just so you know; you cannot cut an earthworm in half and wait around for it to begin regrowing its body on both sides. In fact, you should probably just leave earthworms alone in general since they’re not exactly hurting you. And also, it’s a little gross and sadistic to do this, so there is that.

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Dropping A Coin from The Eiffel Tower Won’t Kill Anyone

My question is this; how many people head to the top of the tower and do just this hoping to see whether or not it will really happen? It’s gross. The good news, however, is that it’s not the truth. You will kill no one by doing this, so trying is really just a great way to throw away money. And that’s the truth.