7 Lies People Tell at the Start of a Relationship

Starting a new relationship often feels like a fresh canvas. Everyone wants to make a good impression and sometimes that means stretching the truth a little. We hide parts of ourselves or exaggerate others, hoping our date won’t notice. These small fibs might seem harmless at first, but they can create problems later on.

1. I’m Totally Over My Ex

Fresh breakups rarely lead to complete emotional healing. Many people jump into new relationships while still carrying baggage from previous ones. They convince themselves (and their new partner) that they’ve moved on completely.

This claim often hides unresolved feelings that eventually bubble to the surface. The truth? Healing takes time. Someone might be ready to date again without being fully over an ex.

Red flags include constant comparisons, bringing up the ex in unrelated conversations, or keeping extensive mementos. Being honest about where you are in the healing process builds a healthier foundation than pretending old wounds don’t exist.

2. I’m Not Usually This Jealous

At first, jealousy usually keeps a low profile—especially during the honeymoon phase. But as the relationship gets more serious, those possessive feelings tend to sneak out. People often brush it off, saying things like, “That’s not really who I am,” after getting suspicious or acting out.

Reality check: jealousy patterns usually intensify rather than disappear. Someone who monitors your social media interactions or questions your friendships early on is showing their true colors.

Trust forms the backbone of healthy relationships. When someone dismisses jealous behavior as out of character, they’re often hoping you’ll accept increasingly controlling actions as the relationship progresses.

3. I Love Your Friends and Family

Meeting the important people in your partner’s life marks a significant milestone. The pressure to make a good impression leads many to exaggerate their enthusiasm. “Your mom is amazing!” they gush, while secretly counting minutes until they can leave.

Behind forced smiles often lies genuine discomfort or dislike. The truth emerges gradually through canceled plans, subtle complaints, or tension during gatherings.

Authentic connections can’t be faked long-term. While immediate bonds aren’t always possible, honesty works better than false enthusiasm. Saying “I’m looking forward to getting to know them better” respects everyone’s feelings without creating false expectations about relationships that need time to develop naturally.

4. You’re the Only One I’m Talking to

These days, it’s pretty normal for people to date more than one person at a time. But some take it a step further — they hide the fact that they’re seeing other people, making it seem like you’re the only one. They’ll carefully plan their time and clean up their socials to keep each relationship in its own little bubble.

This deception creates an uneven playing field where one person believes they’re in an exclusive relationship while the other continues exploring options. The truth usually surfaces through mutual friends, social media slips, or being spotted in public.

Honesty about dating intentions protects everyone involved. There’s nothing wrong with casual dating if everyone understands the situation. The lie isn’t about seeing multiple people – it’s about denying others the right to make informed choices.

5. My Job Is Going Really Well

Career struggles feel particularly vulnerable to share with someone new. Many people exaggerate job satisfaction, career trajectory, or financial stability to appear more successful. “I’m up for a promotion” might really mean “I hope I don’t get laid off.”

Financial compatibility matters in relationships. Hiding money problems or career uncertainty creates stress when the truth inevitably emerges through missed payments, debt collection calls, or lifestyle limitations.

Discussing career challenges doesn’t make someone less attractive – it shows honesty and self-awareness. Most partners appreciate transparency about financial situations rather than discovering problems after becoming emotionally invested or financially entangled.

6. I Share Your Interests and Hobbies

Ah, the honeymoon phase: when someone who can’t stand bugs suddenly becomes “outdoorsy,” and the person who once called it “sportsball” now screams at the TV like a lifelong fan. Love makes you do wild things—like pretend to enjoy things you’d normally run from.

Faking shared interests creates exhausting pretense. Eventually, the truth emerges through boredom, complaints, or simply running out of basic knowledge about the subject.

Relationships thrive on authenticity, not perfect alignment of interests. Honesty about preferences allows couples to discover genuine common ground while respecting individual passions. Supporting each other’s different hobbies often creates more meaningful connection than pretending to share every enthusiasm.

7. I’m Not Looking for Anything Serious

Ever met someone who says they’re “just looking for something casual,” but acts like they want more? That’s fear talking. Deep down, they crave connection—but staying emotionally distant feels safer than risking rejection. So they keep it chill… even when feelings start to grow.

Mixed signals follow as actions contradict words. They introduce you to friends, plan future events, or show deep emotional investment while maintaining they’re “not ready” for commitment.

This disconnection between words and actions creates confusion and hurt. True intentions eventually reveal themselves through emotional reactions to perceived rejection or jealousy. Honest communication about relationship goals, even when they include uncertainty, allows both people to make informed choices about their emotional investment.